Offload FAQs
Questions about online counselling
Questions about online counselling
Q. Why would online counselling be of any use to me?
If you feel you’re going round in circles, repeating the same patterns again and again and still ending up in the same place, counselling can help you identify these patterns, perhaps locate their roots and learn to recognise and change them.
Counselling can be helpful for people who recognise that they can’t deal with everything on their own and who are prepared to look at their own behaviour and feelings in an honest and open way, even if it involves having to face some difficult psychological truths.
If you find that you’re not getting anywhere by talking things through with other people, it may be that you’ve become stuck and through the process of professional online counselling, you can start to move forward more happily.
^ TOP
Q. What problems can be helped by online counselling?
Here at Offload, the focus tends to be on personal and relationship issues. I’ve worked with many men and women who are concerned about their relationships with partners, friends, work colleagues and family. They may be feeling un-loved, rejected, lacking in self-worth, insecure, jealous, upset about their partner’s behaviour, uncomfortable about sexual matters, upset about family members, work-related issues and so on. My clients often find themselves writing about the past, about childhood experiences and earlier relationships and noticing how these have influenced events in the present.
Offload online counselling isn’t appropriate for people with very serious mental health issues, those struggling with addictions, or people who are in crisis, feeling suicidal or at risk of harming themselves or others.
^ TOP
Q. What do counsellors do that a friend can’t?
Although it’s good to have a support network and trusted friends, counsellors have been trained in some very specific professional helping skills, which take time to accomplish and require considerable investment in terms of time and money.
Counsellors adhere to a strict code of confidentiality – something friends can’t be expected to do.
You don’t have any social or emotional connections with your counsellor and as the work takes place online, it’s sometimes easier to be more frank and honest than within a face to face relationship.
Talking about yourself to friends can sometimes feel self-indulgent and one-sided. You can also feel that you're becoming boring and selfish. Choosing to seek online professional help means you can justify focussing on your personal issues without worrying about other people and you can keep your sessions entirely private.
^ TOP
Q. Don’t counsellors just ask ‘and how do you feel about that?’
Sometimes they do, yes… but not just randomly. The aim of counselling is to help you to become unstuck and to move forward. Reflecting honestly on your true feelings can help you to understand yourself better and feel less confused and stuck. Counselling is a way of helping people to hear themselves, the theory being that we all know what the answers are really… we just don’t necessarily know what they are until we hear ourselves say them out loud or write them down.
^ TOP
Q. So what do counsellors do?
Counsellors aren't any different to anyone else - they don't live perfect and problem-free lives, but they've been trained to listen in a very particular way to help people to hear themselves and to look at their lives from new angles.
Counselling isn’t really something counsellors do, any more than parenting is something parents do. Counselling is a very particular kind of relationship within which people are encouraged to grow. When counsellors are in work mode, they are listening in a different way to the way we listen in everyday life. Through respecting and valuing the individuality of each client, acknowleging and reflecting back their clients' feelings and beliefs, helping their clients to delve more deeply into their lives and look at things more closely, often the real source of their clients' problems come to the surface.
People often come into counselling with a specific problem, but find themselves talking about something completely different. Counselling can help you access issues that you may have pushed to the back of the drawer, but could do with looking at, even if it's to decide to chuck them in the bin.
^ TOP
Q. What happens during a counselling session at Offload?
Sometimes it may be that Offload is not the appropriate service for you, in which case this will be explained and alternative help will be suggested if possible.
Once we’ve agreed that counselling with Offload is appropriate for you, we will communicate via counselling emails. I will read your material and ‘interrupt’ at key points by asking questions, making observations or statements, or offering other interpretations to help you think about your feelings and actions more clearly. There are no right or wrong responses; there are just your responses, which are then explored more deeply. You will receive your counselling response in the form of a ‘Word’ document, via Safe-mail, and once you’ve had time to read and process its contents, you are invited to respond back with your next session.
Having taken the first, perhaps difficult, step and sent off your first session, hopefully you’ll find that after receiving my response, you’ll feel able to begin to engage in the counselling process and start feeling more comfortable. Many clients feel extremely supported by counselling and find that it helps them to feel less overwhelmed and much more empowered. If it doesn’t feel right, it’s absolutely fine to stop and perhaps find a different counsellor or a different form of help. Successful counselling relies to a very large extent on the quality of the therapeutic relationship between client and counsellor.
^ TOP
Q. How do I know you’re a real counsellor?
Understandably, because online counselling isn’t a face to face activity, there are trust issues. Counselling isn’t yet a regulated profession, so there are lots of people who claim to be ‘counsellors’ who may not have formal qualifications.
The British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy (BACP) is the largest professional body within the sector, and exists to enable access to ethical and effective psychological therapy by setting and monitoring of standards. Membership requirements include meeting stringent training and professional criteria and agreeing to abide by the Ethical Framework for Good Practice in Counselling and Psychotherapy.
I have a Level 4 Diploma in Therapeutic Counselling, (CPCAB Qual. code TC- L4), and I have completed additional training in online practice at the Online Therapy Institute http://www.onlinetherapyinstitute.com/
I’m also an Executive Committee member of ACTO the Association of Counselling & Therapy online. http://acto-uk.org/
^ TOP